Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Global Warming = China Syndrome

Oh no! Look at the cute little bears! Why they're in trouble...their home''s......


And all because you prefer to motor your way through life, belching carbon, smog and God knows what else into our precious ecosystem! Bad person! Very bad, bad person!

But wait what is THIS.

Well, apparently it's a friggin' lie folks, fed to the fawning media by that bloated wonder Al "The Goreacle" Gore. Read the story. I don't want to spoil anything for you, but it turns out that ice tends to melt in August, and that polar bears can swim. My guess is they'd find Al's bloated carcass pretty tasty too, which would do nature more net good than his ridiculous crusade.

I can't say that any one thing convinced me that the global warming "crisis" was a load of crap, because it was really the sum total of all the goofiness that surrounds the crusade. It's the campaign for government dollars to finance studies, the call by poor countries (read dirty polluters) to put economic constraints on rich countries, and of course, the enforced group think around the global warming elite.

But how did I decide that Global Warming was this decade's China Syndrome? It was when this song, this awful, awful song won an Oscar award. Can anyone listen to this nightmare of a tune and tell me what Oscar winning song in the history of the Oscars was worse? Of course not, because a worse song simply does not exist.

I mean really look at these lyrics:

And as a child
I danced like it was 1999
My dreams were wild
The promise of this new world
Would be mine
Now I am throwing off the carelessness of youth
To listen to an inconvenient truth

"As a child I danced like it was 1999?" What the hell does that mean! "Now I'm throwing off the carelessness of youth to listen to an inconvenient truth"? This is the stuff of Oscar winning songs? My bet is that the only person who listens to this song is Al Gore while he preens in the mirror and says all those comforting words that the shrink gave to him to get over "The Loss".

Oh this song has it all preachy lyrics, hopelessly ridiculous rhymes, and of course the natural presumption that if one doesn't agree then one is either stupid, asleep or evil. Most likely all three.

What this world needs is not another folk singer, croaking out a song about environmental science that she can't possibly begin to understand, nor do we need a bloated ex-veep with too much time on his hands. Nope what we need is a good cold snap so that these folks can go back to worrying about THIS.

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