Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Isaac Hayes, Shot Gun Dick & My Revelation

Wally, a new and valued visitor to the sight took issue in the comments section below with my depiction of Uncle Dick the Gun Happy Veep as a guy "who at one time seemed reasonable". I stand behind that description and I am having thoughts about another post that maybe I should work on:

"The Vice Presidency; The Office That Leads Men to Madness."

See my recent Algore remembrance/Tipper sexual fantasy post for more evidence.

But I'm getting off track. To give me a subtle jab, Wally points out that Ole 12 Gauge once told Pat Leahey to "F-off" on the senate floor. While we can all agree that this was terribly inappropriate, and decidedly uncivilized, I must confess that I was never able to work up the requisite level of outrage that I probably should have over Shotgun Dick's remark.

Well, in a moment of white hot clarity it all came to me. I hate to always quote movies as a template for explaining life, but they are art, and art exists not only to entertain but also inform. Tonight, we learn that that famous Blacksploitation classic, "Shaft" held the key to the underlying reasons for my ambivalence. Allow me to paraphrase Isaac Hayes and his back up singers in the film's title song:

"Hey Leahey, F-off!"

"You watch your mouth"

"Baby I'm talkin' about Leahey"

"Then we can dig it"

See? It makes total sense. Good lord, were it me, I'd have probably given the guy a swirly, or maybe a nuclear wedgie! Talk about indecorous, I doubt anyone has ever attempted those moves on the Senate floor!

As for Cheney, the Shaft example works for me. Some guys just deserve the abuse for being insufferable prigs, and there is little doubt Leahey is one of those guys.

One recommendation if, unlike me it's not too late for you. Try not to picture Uncle Dick in the gold chain outfit sittin' behind the electric keyboards. Because let me tell you, that is one very disturbing visual brother, very disturbing indeed.

I'm going to have to go fantasize about Tipper now.

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