Wednesday, October 19, 2005

From The "What Were They Thinking Files"

It's times like these that I wonder exactly how the pitch went. No doubt, it was some lower level up and comer that wanted to really make his mark selling Budweiser as early in his career as possible. In fact, I'll bet that at some point this young go getter, we can call him Winthorp for example got to be kind of annoying at Bud global headquarters.

"Sir, we need somebody to run the collegiate , er....I mean young, but definately of legal age drinkers campaign. Miller is killing us with that slacker promo and we got nuthin!"

"Who's that young feller, just out of know the one thats always askin me to give him a break?"

"You mean Winthorp sir?"

"Yes! Thats the guy. Lot of energy, not much on the smarts side though. I bet he could relate to those college, er I mean young but definately legal drinkers!"

"Oh I don't know about Winthorp sir....."

"Well I do! Kid drives me nuts, give him a couple hundred thou, put him on the road and get him out of my hair!"

So Winthorp, who now has more money than he's ever seen in his entire life calls his frat pals to boast, and perhaps get some ideas:



"Dude, the old man gave me a couple hundy to spend on gettin you guys to drink bud!"

"Like thats excellent dude!"

"Yeah, but I don't know what to do with this cash, I spent some on lap dances and Zima, but I still have like 199 thousand left"

"Oh duuudddde I got an idea"


"Yeah! Go get a bunch of balls and glasses made and pass them out for like a drinking game"

"Oh yeah, like quarters!"

"Right dude, and then people will start chuggin Bud! The more they chug the more you sell!"

"Excellent! and the more I sell, the more lap dances and Zima I can buy!"

"Whoa dude, dont Bogart the lap dances and Zima!"

"No way! I'll buy you lap dances and Zima too cuz you rock dude"

And so it goes until one day, an article appears in the New York Times.......

"Morning Mr. Busch!"

"Winthorp! Is that you!"

"Yes Mr. Busch, good to see you"

"Winthorp, what are you doing here? I thought we fired you after that Bud Pong fiasco!"

"Well, you did Mr. Busch"


"So, I took that experience, got an MBA and now I'm a crisis management consultant."

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