Thursday, January 13, 2005

Women Gone Wild!!

There is a commercial on TV that has been running for a while, that astounds me to no end.

"There she goes, there she goes again"

You know what I'm talking about right? The birth control pill commercial - Orthatetranobabiesforyou its called. Or something like that.

At any rate, this commercial originally caught my eye because the song, as it is wistfully sung by Sixpence None The Richer, is kind of sexy/cute. That and the fact that semi dressed women were jumping up and down on the TV, apparently very eager to have sex. Odd as it may seem, I found that quite attractive.

So I enjoyed the commercial for what it was when it came on every now and then. A little mind candy, but I really didn't give it much thought. Of course, now I can't get it out of my mind. Because, it seems, there is so much more.

"There she goes, there she goes again"

Could this possibly have been a mistake. Was it some subconscious longing of the creative staff that put the ad together? "There she goes - you wish!" I said to myself. The more I watched though, I realized every word must have been intended. Every word and so much more.

What is the message these guys are trying to deliver? "Orthatetranobabiesforyou - the pill for women who boink like rabbits" seems to be the slogan they were going for. If that's the case, then I'm here to tell you these women don't need birth control, the need some self restraint!

At that moment I was lost. I had to find out more. So I went to look up the lyrics - and I found this little ditty:

"There she goes, there she goes again, she calls my name, SHE PULLS MY TRAIN"

Go back, read that again, I'll wait.

Please do not get me wrong here, if she wants to pull your train, my train or anyone's train I'm ok with that. In fact, depending on whose train is getting pulled, I may even encourage it. But for goodness sake, this is a birth control commercial! Train pulling could definitely lead to non-birth like control behavior!

At that moment of realization the full nefarious intent, yes the true genius of the ad was clear to me; "My God, they aren't just selling birth control, they are creating market demand at the same time!" I said to no one in particular. People this is pure genius! As they say in TV ad land though, "but wait there's more".

Oh yes, so much more. This commercial, it became like an obsession for me. Genius like this just doesn't show up on TV everyday, so when it does it must be studied. Knowledge can be gained and passed to future generations. That is when I noticed the visuals.

Flowers. More specifically open, blossoming, pink flowers. Beautiful, orchids and lilies in full bloom, their petals spread wide, and stamens shamelessly displayed. Bring anything to mind? In another scene, an actress languishes clitoral like in the smooth folds a tree trunk, a dreamy inviting look in her eye. I imagine that at that moment, men all over the country are leaning over to there wives/partners (lets face it we're men - total strangers) with that old familiar look in their eye.

Then the moment of triumph! What is a woman to do? Why with the full support of Orthotetranobabliesfor you, she hasn't a care in the world! The final scene delivers this message with all the subtlety of the preceding 54 seconds; an image of a woman is created from the drawing of the flower -the petals turn into her skirt, the stamen become her legs. She leans back on the product name, kicking her legs high in the air.

Is this a great country or what?

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